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Have Faith in Love
Chapter 5
Again they tossed a concussion grenade through the gate, only this time, they tossed a couple of extra, hoping that they would go a bit farther. SGI-5 and SGI-3 were with them, and when they finally walked through, there were unconscious Jaffa everywhere. They all moved slowly, staying alert, picking up staff weapons to add to their own arms.
"See if you can reach him, Case," Jack said softly as they moved into the woods beside the gate.
She nodded. "Daniel? Sweetheart, can you talk?" She waited, then shook her head. "My Heart, we’re on the planet. We’re going to be in the woods near the gate until you signal."
They took up defense positions, and waited. It was dark before he contacted her.
'Angel?'
"I’m here," she whispered.
'Head north to the side entrance, there are two huge statues there. Behind the statues will be four guards. The gate itself is unlocked.'
"We’re on our way."
'Let me know when you get there. I probably won’t be able to answer, but I need to know where you are.'
"Okay."
'Love you, Angel.'
"Love you, too." She turned to Jack. Repeated the instructions her Husband had given.
Jack nodded, then signaled the rest of the group. They began to move forward silently in the dark, their night vision goggles lighting their way. They found the gate without any problems, and the guards were quickly and quietly dispatched. The Tok’ra had provided a map of the palace, so the group went over it carefully. They split into teams of two, securing rooms and planting C-4 charges in each.
A A A A A A
Neferteri tried to put her arms around him. He pushed her arms away, moved to the other side of the room. "You still think of her. Still dream of her. I hear you whisper her name as you sleep. I think, my Beloved, it is time that we bring her here. You will kill her, and rid yourself of this…this obsession." she said, anger in her voice.
Daniel looked at her. "You think that killing her will stop me from loving her?"
The Goa’uld smiled. "It will help you to get over her. If she is dead, there will be no chance for…reconciliation, will there? If she is dead from your hand, your love will not survive."
He shook his head and looked away from her, willing his beautiful Wife to get there soon.
'Daniel, we’re inside,' Casey’s sweet voice echoed in his head.
He'd never contacted her without speaking out loud, but now he had to try. ‘Go down the hall that you’re in, fourth door on the left. And hurry!’
'On our way. If she’s with you, I’m gonna kill her!'
He couldn’t help but smile.
Neferteri smiled back. "Tell me what you were thinking just now, when your eyes lit up with such love? Were you thinking about us?"
Daniel looked at her. "You could say that."
The Goa’uld ran her hand lightly down the side of her body. "Do you wish to make love to me again?" She moved to stand beside Daniel, ready to put her arms around his neck
The door burst open, and Casey stood there, her P90 aimed at the Goa’uld. "Get away from my Husband, you snake-headed bitch!"
Neferteri’s eyes went wide, then narrowed to slits. She grabbed a long knife from the scabbard on her hip, handed it to him. "Kill her, beloved, kill her now!"
Daniel took the knife. "As you wish," he said, as he drove the blade into the Goa’uld’s bare stomach. He watched as the woman dropped to the floor. That had been something he had wanted to do for days. No one outside of this palace had any idea how sadistic, how cruel this woman was. Only her fevered ‘love’ for him spared him from her almost constant wrath. Without a doubt he was releasing the terrorized host from a hellish existence.
He looked up at Casey and grinned. His mind didn’t register the dark circles under her eyes from too many nights without sleep, or the hollow cheeks from days of being unable to eat. She was more beautiful than he remembered. "Hey, gorgeous."
"Hey, handsome. What do you say we blow this Popsicle stand?" she grinned.
"Let’s go."
She shook her head. "No, sweetheart, we’re really going to blow the place."
He grinned and shook his head. He loved her sense of humor. "Did you bring anything for me?" he asked, nodding at her weapon. She pulled her sidearm from the holster and tossed it to him. "Let’s go."
Casey took long enough to set a charge in the room, then followed him back out into the hallway. Daniel led her to a room where there were several computers. He downloaded everything he could while she kept guard at the door.
"Got it, let’s go," he whispered, sliding several small crystals into his pocket. They slipped back into the hallway, then headed for the same iron gate where the team had entered. Everyone was waiting when they arrived.
"Head count," Jack whispered. When it was determined that all were present and accounted for, the group ran toward the ‘gate. They were nearly there when the C-4 charges began to go off.
A A A A A A
As soon as they were safe in the gate room, Casey turned to Daniel. He was already reaching for her. He pulled her close, crushed her against his chest, then lowered his head to kiss her. He poured his love into that kiss, felt it returned with every caress of her tongue.
She pulled away, breathless. "Love you," she whispered.
"Love you, Angel," he whispered in reply. He saw the flash of anger in her eyes a split second before her fist impacted on his jaw, sending him flying backwards over the low railing of the ramp. He sat up, rubbing his face, knowing that he deserved that, and much more.
Duncan, Jack and Teal'c were already moving for the door.
"Freeze! Don’t you bastards even think about trying to hide from me!" She turned to the two SG units that stood watching, mouths agape. "I want you out of this room. You will close and lock that door, and you will not open it until I tell you that you can. No matter what you hear, you stay on that side of the door or by the gods I’ll get you too!" she hissed, her eyes blazing with anger, the flames nearly leaping out of the green depths. The two teams looked over at the four men who stood near the far wall, sympathy in their eyes as they fled the room.
Daniel stood now with the other three men, all of them with their hands in their pockets, all of them trying to avoid making eye contact with her. "Babe, it wasn’t supposed to happen like this! You were supposed to think I was captured-"
"Be quiet," she said. "Just…be quiet." She looked at them, all four of them looking at her with something akin to fear in their eyes. She almost giggled, but the anger tamped it down. "Be damned glad that I don’t have a sword," she said, repeating what she had said earlier, upon her return from PY2-498.
Duncan shuddered at the look of absolute fury in her eyes. "Casey-"
"Didn’t I just say be quiet?" Her voice was cool, calm. She started pacing the floor in front of them. "I can understand that my eyes give things away, and that you needed to keep me in the dark…at first. The second, and I do mean the very second we were in this 'gate room after that…that scene…you should have told me what was going on! Do you think I am so incapable of controlling myself?"
Jack started to open his mouth. She raised her fist; he snapped it closed and took a step backward.
"If I couldn’t control my temper, all four of you assholes would be bleeding all over the floor right now. If I couldn’t control my temper, you’d all be headless right now! As it is, I’m damned tempted to empty every friggin’ clip I have into you. And I have four full clips, gentlemen," she said, lowering her voice. "Do you have any idea, any at all what I went through? What your damned macho pride put me through? ‘Can’t trust the little woman with a secret this big’," she said mockingly. "Let me tell you something, if you, any of you ever, ever do something like this to me again, this universe won’t be big enough for you to hide in! I will kill you…I’ll take your freakin’ head! Do I make myself clear?"
"Casey, we didn’t think-" Jack started.
She whirled to face him. "Damned straight you didn’t think!" She clenched her fists at her side, glaring at each of them in turn. She let out a scream of frustration that had them backing in unison against the wall. She turned to face Daniel. "I don’t suppose it occurred to you that you could contact me and let me know what was going on before you were ready for extraction? You could have told me what was going on, let me know that you still loved me, and when it was time, just said, ‘Casey, come get me’! But no, you had to leave me in the dark, hurting so badly that I damned nearly orphaned my daughter!"
His widened. "Babe, I never realized-"
"No! You didn’t bother to think about it, did you? What is it with you men? What is so damned hard about trusting me? Have I ever let you down on any mission? Have I ever once done anything to jeopardize a mission? Am I that unreliable? Am I that incapable? Because if that’s what you bastards think, if you really believe that, then I shouldn’t be working with your sorry damned asses, should I?" She was fighting back tears.
She never noticed that Tessa, Sam, and Carlotta were in the control room, had been since an hour before her arrival, alerted by Erin to what had been going on. They were enjoying every minute of her tirade. The three women, and Erin, had taken turns sitting with Casey, holding her while she cried over what she believed was the end of her marriage; seeing the pain…the absolute, utter devastation in her eyes. They had been in the dark just as much as she had. And were just as angry at being left there.
Casey stalked over to where she had dropped her P90. She picked it up, so tempted to use it that she had to fight to keep her finger off of the trigger. She turned around, the four men standing against the wall, bracing themselves for the death they were sure was coming. She was still angry. She gave in to the impulse. She raised the weapon, and began firing at the ceiling above them, bringing down chunks of plaster, screaming her rage at the same time. When she was finished, they were on the floor, hands covering their heads. The three women in the control room were laughing out loud now. She tossed the weapon aside, turned her back to the men, dropped down on her knees and let the pent up anger, frustration and pain pour out in sobs that wracked her slender frame.
Strong, familiar arms wrapped themselves around her. She felt herself pulled back against a muscular chest. "Babe, I didn’t think they’d let you believe…I never thought you’d believe that I don’t love you. Didn’t I tell you that morning that I’d always love you?" Daniel asked softly, holding her close.
She thought about that morning, had thought about it often. Only now, this very moment, did she realize what he had been trying to tell her. She turned in his arms, buried her head against his shoulder, felt his lips against her face.
"Casey, I really am sorry. You’re absolutely right. We should have told you. It’s just that, we were afraid that if you knew, understood what Daniel would have to do, you’d go-" Jack started.
She jerked her head up, raised a hand to stop whatever he was saying, realization like a slap in the face. Her cheeks paled dramatically. She looked into Daniel’s eyes. The flames of anger were gone, replaced by dull, aching pain. "Did you sleep with her?"
The blue eyes dropped for a moment.
She pulled away from him, slid across the floor, putting needed distance between them. "I suppose we could say it was the same as when I slept with Duncan because of the Fire. Except it isn’t. I didn’t…neither Duncan nor I had a choice. You went into this knowing that you would have…made the decision to…was it good for you? Did you…enjoy it? Did she… please you?"
"No! Hell, I could barely get it up! I fucked her, Casey. I never made love to her. You better than anyone know exactly what the difference is!" Daniel exclaimed, anger in his own voice, desperate for her to understand that what he had done meant nothing to him, it was nothing but a means to get information.
She looked into his eyes, saw the love, the hurt…"I believe you," she whispered, after what seemed an eternity to him.
He reached out and cupped her cheek with his hand. Too close, he thought. I'm too close to losing her. His heart was pounding with fear. "I managed to only have to…twice. When I finally made contact with the Tok’ra spy, she had a drug that I could use, made…her…sort of pass out, I could tell her that we had…and she believed it," he said softly. "Babe, you were never supposed to know about any of this. I didn’t want it to hurt you. It was a job that had to be done, and I was the one, the only one, who could do it."
She closed her eyes and pushed her cheek against his palm. "Love you," she whispered.
"Oh, god, babe, I love you," he moaned. He pulled her back into his embrace and kissed her. "I never got as hard as I do for you," he whispered in her ear. "Never came like I do with you. Hell, I’ve come more jerking off."
She gave a small smile. "That bad, huh?"
"No Fire babe. There was no Fire, and sure as hell no emotion. Can’t make love without those two things. Otherwise, it’s…it’s just masturbating in a willing body."
She wrapped her hands around his face. "I wish I didn’t know about this. I can’t promise you that I’ll get over it soon."
"It’s okay, babe, I understand." His heart was still beating fast, clinging to every word she said, listening to every nuance, searching for his salvation, relief that she was still in his arms filling his mind.
"It’s not the just sex, Daniel, that’s actually the easiest part to deal with. And that is not easy to deal with, believe me. It’s the trust. That you didn’t think you could trust me."
"I’ll do whatever it takes, babe. Whatever you want, you’ve got it."
"Your trust."
"You’ve always had that, Casey. I really didn’t know that they didn’t tell you. I didn’t know that they would let you go through…that." He looked up at Jack and Duncan. Now that he had time to think about what had happened, to understand that they had left her ignorant of what was going on right up to the end, he was angry with them. He was furious at what they had put Wife through. "Why? Why didn’t you tell her when you saw what it was doing to her?"
Jack looked at the floor. "Daniel, the truth is, we really thought she’d head straight to the ‘gate and blow the whole mission. Especially if she knew you had to…Hell, everybody knows how she feels about you."
"So you didn’t trust her?"
Jack shrugged, and looked over at Duncan.
Daniel pulled Casey to her feet. "Let’s go home babe. I have a resignation to type out. So do you."
Everyone in the room, and those in the control room as well, looked at him with shock on their faces.
"Daniel, I understand that you’re upset-" Duncan started.
"Duncan, she tried to kill herself…permanently! She could still be floating out in that ocean on PY2-498 if not for sheer luck! My daughter would be without a mother, I’d be without my very heart and soul. If you can’t…if you don’t trust her, then you don’t need to have her working for you. And if she doesn’t work here, neither do I."
Jack grabbed Daniel by the arm. "You have every right to be angry. But don’t quit. We need you, Daniel. We need Casey, too."
Daniel jerked his arm free. "You don’t trust her, but you need her. Right." It was bad enough to have to go on that goddamned mission, to be forced to...do…what he had to do. Knowing how much his wife had suffered during that same time simply because Jack...his friend!…didn’t trust her to do the job she was trained for, created for, made him so angry he could barely see straight.
Casey, still wide-eyed from Daniel’s statement, took his hand. "Sweetheart, I’m an Immortal, it’s my job to protect the Innocents. You’re The Chosen, you can’t walk away either."
Daniel pulled her into his embrace. "I won’t work with people who don’t trust you," he whispered.
"This is the only time in how many missions? I can understand their reasoning. I don’t like it, I don’t agree with it, and it pisses me off that they didn’t give me a chance to prove myself, but now that I know the…details…I can understand it," she said softly.
"Let’s go home, Angel. I want to see my daughter. We’ll talk about it there." Daniel put his arm around her shoulder. Casey knocked on the door and told the men on the other side that it was safe to open it. They left the room arm in arm.
Jack looked at Duncan. "Well, that went well, didn't it? Find Methos. That son-of-a-bitch is going to explain to her, to both of them."
It didn’t take long for Dr. Montigue to clear them and send them on their way. Daniel refused to let go of her hand, terrified that if he did, she'd slip away from him…forever.
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